To disclose or not to disclose? That is the question
Yesterday, we took a tour of the FDR Memorial as a group. It was pretty awesome and interesting. Probably the most interesting part was learning about the debate that surrounded whether or not to build a statue showing FDR in his wheelchair. Just in case anybody doesn't know, FDR contracted polio on his honeymoon and was never again able to walk without assistance. FDR however went to great lengths to conceal this from the public, even going so far as to paint his braces black so that they would blend in with his pant legs. All of this got me thinking about something I've been thinking a lot about since I arrived in DC: disclosure.
Disclosure, or whether or not you tell people you have a disability, is a really complicated, and oftentimes heavily debated issue. Some of us in the disability community don't really have all that much choice when it comes to disclosure. In my case for example, most people can tell just by looking at me that I have a disability. That doesn't mean that they know what my disability is, or that they understand all the components of it, but they know I'm disabled. There are parts of my disability that I have very little choice about disclosing, and there other parts where disclosure is entirely up to me. I have friends whose disabilities are entirely invisible, and who could spend their whole lives "passing", or blending in as able-bodied if that's what they decided to do. Before we go any further let me just say that I think the decision about whether or not to disclose is an incredibly personal one. I think that in our society, there is no "right" choice about disclosure. That being said I do think it is important to talk about why disclosure is such a big deal in the first place.
Why should it matter if somebody knows I have a disability or not? Why is it sometimes recommended that disabled people don't disclose? Why have so many of us become so good at hiding a huge part of ourselves? To some degree it is because we have no choice. Whether we like it or not we live in a world where disability comes imbued with stigma and assumptions of incompetence, no matter how unfair they may be. Whether we like it or not it is easier to be seen as able-bodied than it is to be seen as disabled. There is an unspoken privilege that comes with able-bodiedness-that makes it such a desirable state of being. For the most part, my able-bodied counterparts are not forced to prove on a daily basis that they are able to complete even the simplest of tasks. For the most part, my able-bodied counterparts do not have their adulthood questioned for no other reason than because of how they look. For the most part, it is so much easier to be able-bodied than it is to be disabled. When you are able-bodied you do not have to go the extra 10 miles to convince somebody to give you a job. When you are able-bodied, or appear to be, you are afforded all the privileges that come with that state in life.
Disclosure is so complicated because it's not only about whether you're personally proud to be disabled, which can be a complex issue in itself, but it is also about how the world will react to you. Disclosure is so complicated because you are forced to consider, whether you want to or not, the walls that will go up around you when you claim the identity of "disabled. Disclosure will always be a complicated issue until attitudes change. Disclosure will always be a complicated issue until disabled people can disclose their disabilities without being afraid of not getting a job, or not getting into their dream school.To someone on the outside, these things may seem ridiculous, because in theory it is completely illegal to deny somebody these things because of his or her status as a disabled person, but the reality, that those of us in the community know too well, is that discrimination happens every day. I've experienced it firsthand, and I know my friends have too.
I think that when looking at disclosure we have to look at the attitudes of our society. When looking at disclosure we have to understand why someone would be so afraid to disclose. I believe in disclosure. I believe it's important because it shows the world you're not ashamed of who you are, but in the interest of honesty, I must admit there have been many times when I have held back. If I'm being honest I have to tell you that there are many days that I have wished my disability was invisible, not because I was ashamed of who I am, but because I knew that if people thought I was able-bodied they would treat me better, they would give me a chance.
I understand why FDR went to such great lengths to hide his disability. I understand that he, like so many of us, was afraid of the consequences of disclosure. I understand all these things, but I also understand how important it is to set the record straight. I understand that it is important for people to know that FDR was a wheelchair user. I understand that it is important for them to see that his disability did not mean that he could not be a great leader. I understand, as someone who once saw FDR as a symbol for all the things that I could do, the importance of disclosure, even after the fact. I believe that disclosure will change people's minds because they will see that people they already love, respect, and trust are disabled. They will see that disabled is a valid identity, and that it doesn't stand for what you cannot do. I hope that with enough disclosure people will stop making assumptions, and that future generations of disabled people will never have to be ashamed of who they are.